Unfinished Pieces

Thought No. 6

I start so many things. Creative things. Writing. Painting. Moving. Things that feel so hard to finish. Over the past few months I have started pieces of writing that I have left unfinished. Here I go battling the concept of being imperfect. Familiar. I don’t think it takes away from the beauty that it is left unfinished. It might take away from me. Who I tell myself I am. A disciplined person who prides herself on carrying out an idea and making it a reality. Maybe the floating idea is worthy enough. Not in a business sense. Not in my 9-5. But, right here. This piece captures all my unfinished pieces, my drafts. I’ll write about why it was difficult to finish in the moment. Not sure whether it will help. Not sure if it will even be a worthy read. Possibly, cures doubt? Maybe, it’s just the in between. Isn’t that enough?

Unfinished Piece 1

I felt overwhelmed by the thought of keeping note of my what I enjoyed in January. You know when you think of it all, all at once? Seemed like way too much for me to capture.

Unfinished Piece 2

I felt like a failure for not proceeding with the January post that I started a February one. I thought, maybe I can track my month during the month instead of complete it all at once. I proceeded to write nothing.

Unfinished Piece 3

The intention was to capture how it feels to experience summer in Australia. Committed to the title after eating a mango. Left it at the title.

Unfinished Piece 4

I baked so many cookies. I fixated hard to find the perfect recipe. Everyday. Opened substack to document it all in detail instead of instagram. Thought about how much time it would take to compare when I can trial again and not make it chore? Maybe it didn’t need so much detail. I think I told myself that because it felt like too much to capture. Left it. Still want to finish it.

Unfinished Piece 5

I liked this. to start. I felt like I could look back on it. Then I felt like an idiot. Who wraps up this shit? Like why I am I doing this. Actually felt like a loser thinking about it. Stopped. Thought about the fact that I’m turning 30. Thought about the list being horrible. Plagued by too many negative thoughts. Closed immediately.

Unfinished Piece 6

I started writing this piece after an intense day at my 9-5. A grey machine that drains creativity. A workplace that was once colourful even if corporate has slowly become colourless. Little robots longing for that beverage to drown the sorrows. I always comfort myself with the thought of opening up my little bakery in the morning. I felt the urge to write about how it would feel. Why I can’t leave the grey place. Again, overwhelmed by I’m not sure really. I think I was distracted by to-do list for the day so I closed it. A piece I want to still finish.

Unfinished Piece 7

A started writing without thinking. Just watching. This felt so nice and liberating. I remember feeling warm and like I could capture this all night. I want to finish this piece.

Seven unfinished pieces in total. Feels ironic that I made it to the end of this piece and I might just actually finish it. I’m left with the thought that I need to slow down and write. I like it. I enjoy it. Another thought, it’s okay to leave things unfinished and come back to them or not. You don’t always have to come back to them. It would be the opposite of a creative process if it had a strict process to follow. Steals the creativity. I’m happy I wrote this. Society romanticises closure, productivity, and polish. I left things undone. Might be preserved here now or revisited at a later right time.

Christiana